I'm sitting down to write here tonight, but it feels overdue. Yesterday I had a really tough day and I probably needed to purge my emotions then, but didn't have the energy. Brad and I actually had a really fun weekend with our friends in College Station at a softball tournament. But coming home after time away, always seems to get to me... It's like when I'm away from home, I miss both boys so much and can't wait to get home. So when we finally walk in the door, I'm so excited to see Tate, but I also know that Nash won't be there with him.
I had a hard evening and pretty much a breakdown when it was time to go to bed. I was completely exhausted from a long weekend of not a lot of sleep and this just compounded how much I was missing my little boy. I did something I haven't done since Nash died.
With my heart pounding, I sat at the computer and found a video clip of Tate and Nash last year around this time. It's not any special occasion - just an afternoon home with my babies. I just sat there, staring at Nash's perfect little face, trying to memorize every little detail. Sometimes I have to remind myself that he wasn't just a dream. He was here. He was really here. I touched him. I heard him. I felt him. He was here. Thank God he was here.
I'm sharing this short clip with y'all because not many of you got a chance to meet Nash. So friends, meet my little man...
Love to y'all,
Tracy
2 comments:
Awe...he is so precious! Just like I remember him...and time won't take that away from me. I am so sad that you have to have days like yesterday. Still think about you and your family all the time.
I love it. I remember that he did like watching TV. I know that everyone will love getting a glimpse into this little baby's happy life and they'll enjoy hearing your interaction with him. May God give you comfort, Tracy - today and every day.
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