Good-Bye

As most of you know, it's been a really crazy week... Fourteen hours from now we will finally close on our old house and it will be in the hands of it's new owners.

The past three days have been spent moving to our new house. We are so blessed to have had so many people helping us... some of our friends, my parents, and Brad's mom, brother, and cousin even came down from Iowa to help us out. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Tate seems to be settling in pretty well. He's very worn out by the end of each day. I think he's still a little confused about what's going on. But overall, he's doing his best to adjust and is enjoying exploring his new house.

Today I had to do something I've been dreading since the day our house was sold. I went over there for the last time. I walked through each room, trying to remember all the little details. It's so funny how a house can hold so much meaning... After all, it's just a shell of wood and brick. And yet each room represents distinct memories. The spot in the kitchen where I was when I told Brad I was pregnant with Tate. The bathroom where both our boys got their nightly baths. The floor in front of the TV in the family room where Nash would play. The boys' bedrooms. It's hard to believe that I won't ever be back within those walls again.

That house became a part of our family. It knows all our deepest secrets and has felt our grief in our darkest hours. As much as I wanted to move, I am so sad to say good-bye. I am thankful for the six years we had in it and pray that it's next owner makes many happy memories there as well.

As I drove away today, tears streaming down my cheeks, I couldn't help but pray that Nash knows where to find us. I know that he is in all of our hearts and with us no matter where we go. But it's really hard for me to worry that he thinks we left him or that we are moving on. I want so badly to tell him that even though his little feet haven't touched the floors of our new house, he is here with us. He is still a member of our family and we will carry him with us always.

We leave tomorrow to head to Iowa until July 5th. Brad isn't going to join us for a couple of weeks. I know Tate and I are going to miss him like crazy. Please pray for safe travels and for Brad to be safe and sound while we're gone.

Love to y'all,
Tracy